All my life all I ever wanted to do was to be a nurse. I waited 8 long years to finally achieve my dream as I will finally be graduating from Nursing school in a matter of 11 days and venturing out into a world full of wolves, where they eat the baby nurses. Am i ready for this? I believe when i face certain challenges God will give me the strength. Marriage....i believe i am the last of my select group of friends left to be engaged and married and as per customs and traditions of the Indian culture, I believe i might be caving in and forced to get me a Mail-order-husband. Will I ever be able to find a guy who can live up to my expectations? Will i succumb to meeting my "future husband" upon arriving at the Motherland, getting engaged on Monday, and married by Friday, with no contact in between? Am i the kind to say 2 out of 5 aint bad or 4 out of 10 aint bad? NO! i am not!! i believe i deserve the best and if i have to be a old hag waiting for that day or maybe look over ONE thing then I am ready to settle. When I do find someone who meets my criteria and whom i can see myself with, the question then arises, why isn't he already married or an Indian? Why would i put myself in situations where i get hurt and then man up to get over it? I promise, these situations just come looking for me because i barely have time to venture out and get myself in trouble... Life is truly complicated. Just when I thought I didn't need to be married or engaged, the feelings of wanting to participate in such festivities for myself comes to heart? why do i feel out of it, almost in a depersonalization mode? Just don't care anymore...or do i bare that tough facade on the exterior to hide my internal anger and sadness conflicting with each other? I want to be able to experience happiness but for the time being, I shall be patient and wait my turn. When that day comes, I know I will love him with my whole and selfish heart. There is someone for everyone and I cant wait to see who mine is.
Excellent read my dear =). You have totally changed the look of your page and everytthing in a matter of a few days! hahaha I loVE it!! =) Keep on Posting cuss u know u dont talk to me about any of these dark dark secret of your minds =P
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Excellent read my dear =). You have totally changed the look of your page and everytthing in a matter of a few days! hahaha I loVE it!! =) Keep on Posting cuss u know u dont talk to me about any of these dark dark secret of your minds =P